The Big Answer

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Riesman again holds up autonomy as the ideal—the standard by which the other-directed, tradition-directed, the anomic, and the inner-directed are judged. He discusses the difficulties of achieving it amidst the conformity pressures in modern society. One can even conform in one’s nonconformity to society, still being an other-directed conformist in one’s peer group to whom one is loyal. He looks at the political implications of this adjustment-to-society/nonadjustment-to society factor. He looks at self-awareness as the path toward autonomy. Of course, the better the environment in which one lives supports one’s self via nurturing and respect for one’s privacy and decisions and individuality, the more likely one is to develop such awareness, and the less one is likely to hide one’s real self behind a false-self facade for protection and security.

The more the home environment supports one’s real self via nurturing, the less one is likely to have to hide one’s real self behind a false-self facade

And if your real being hides around your family and even yourself, you are far from abnormal, but the sad truth is: you have no life, no spouse, no family and no real connections to humanity